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"This is Manchester. We do things differently here."
Pass out at the Sigma Alpha frat house on a Saturday night... and you get what you deserve.
Look Ma, No cavities.
Star Trek: So White.
If you pass out at a party being held by Kirk, you become a ‘creative canvas.’
Fun with Sharpies.
“My skin is nothing but melanoma, my hair has all fallen out, and my eyes have dilated to the point of blindness, but I still have all my teeth!”
“Why, yes, we did destroy our planet’s ozone layer. How did you know?”
Stop! Who would cross the bridge of death must answer me these questions three ere the other side he see?
Kryten: "Very well, Mr. Lister. Rave mode engaged."
Makeup artist:"We can have your face covered with moss or with snow."
Extra:"Make it snow."
"I'm trying to look like Kryten."
"Kryten? You look more like a cretin."
"So what have you come to the party as?"
"An iced Krispy Kreme doughnut."
Here we see the result of a transporter accident involving Herman Munster and a bucket of some sort of goo from The Home Depot.
“Take a nap said the tattoo artist …
What could go wrong said the tattoo artist…”
“Smile, Gurney.”
“I am smiling.”
"As Count Binface's election agent, how do you feel about your candidate's failure to become Member of Parliament for Clacton?"
"I think failure is a bit strong. Count Binface came second with over 9500 votes. That is about 40% of the votes for the winner! And he gets his deposit back! For the first time ever!"
Just one more plastic surgery and this guy will look like Michael Jackson.
♫ You'll wonder where the yellow went,
when you brush your teeth with Pepsodent! ♫
Yes, yes!!! We LOVE the video movies with gladiators.
Greetings!! They call me Smiley!
"I know how to get plastered."
I really should have read the fine print of my contract.
"Hello! I'm canvassing for Count Binface to be Member of Parliament here in Clacton. Can we count on your vote?"
[In the interests of political balance, other candidates are available - but none of them are sensible.]
"You can keep your warp factor. Round here we need sun protection factor. 50000."
Grit your teeth and carry on.
There were lines on the mirror
Lines on his face.
“No one expects the Stellar Inquisition!”
“Draw me like your French girls.”
Has the ozone layer gotten that bad?
Creepy clowns…. In Spaaaaaaaaaaaaaace….
(offscreen) "You're supposed to use the toothpaste on your teeth idiot!"
That's what you call cracking a smile.
Normally, he was a hard headed guy. But sometimes he was a bit flaky at the edges.
Director: “CUT!!! MAKEUP!!! I specifically requested black teeth… BLACK TEETH!!”
Plastered?
Makeup department, I'll get you for this.
This is the creepiest smile since Kor.
We needed drydock, not drywall.
“Unguent!! I need UNGUENT.”
Pasty white skin: Check!
Ugly Euro style scarf: Check!
All he needs is retro facial hair and we got the first hipster!
"Hi honey! I'm home!"
This is what happens when a plasterer has a bad day at the office.
"Welcome to Spackle-world!"

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© Graham & Ian Kennedy Page views : 158,762 Release date : 1 Sep 2026