Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot?

[Sionnach Glic]

SYDNEY - A New Zealand man has been sentenced to community service after telling police he was raped by a wombat and the experience had made him speak "Australian".

Arthur Ross Cradock, 48, from the South Island town of Motueka, called police on February 11 and told them he was being raped at his home by the wombat and he needed help, The Nelson Mail newspaper reported.

The orchard worker later called back and said: "Apart from speaking Australian now, I'm pretty all right, you know."

Cradock pleaded guilty in the local court to using a phone for a fictitious purpose. He was sentenced to 75 hours' community work.

Police prosecutor Sergeant Chris Stringer told the court alcohol played a large role in Cradock's life.

Source

Weirdest story I've read this month.
Seriously, what the hell?

[Aaron]

Police prosecutor Sergeant Chris Stringer told the court alcohol played a large role in Cradock's life.

Who would have thought.

[Sionnach Glic]

I would have expected even someone completely out of their head drunk to know that this was completely stupid.

[Aaron]

I would have expected even someone completely out of their head drunk to know that this was completely stupid.

I've been around lots of drunks and nothing that they do surprises me anymore. These are people that play car tag or give blowjobs in the middle of the Junior Ranks Mess.

[Mikey]

I wanna learn to speak Australian, too!

[Sionnach Glic]

"Car tag".......I'm not sure I really want to know.

[Mikey]

I've seen it played, too, and it's exactly what you're thinking of. The problem you're experiencing, Rochey, is that folks over here try drinking like the Irish, but don't have the genetic makeup to do it right.