www.ditl.org

A man walks up to a New Zealand shepherd who's tending to one of his flock. The man asks, "Are you shearing her?" The shepherd responds, "I don't sheer her wuth innybody!"

Lt. Staplic wrote:

It's a kiwi... New Zealanders are called "kiwis" because kiwis are native only to New Zealand...

I was always under the impression kiwi's were fruit...that looks like some kind of cross between an early mammel and early bird.

Was that a "Teaos" joke?

Lt. Staplic wrote:I was always under the impression kiwi's were fruit...that looks like some kind of cross between an early mammel and early bird.

Kiwi

It's also a fruit, yes. One of my favorites.

Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and George Washington are on a sinking ship. As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts, "Save the women!" George W. Bush hysterically hollers, "Screw the women!" Bill Clinton's asks excitedly, "Do we have time?"

Bill Clinton is packing things up in the Oval Office when he looks out of the window and sees the phrase "Bill Sucks!" written in urine on the Washington Monument. Furious, he assigns the Secret Service to conduct an investigation. After a few hours, one of the agents comes back. "I have some good news and some bad news, Mr. President. The good news is that the DNA test came back as Kenneth Starr." "Well," Bill asks, "what's the bad news?" The agent looks uneasy, and answers, "It's Hillary's handwriting."

Some people like to soak their cigars in rum. Still others like to soak them in whiskey. Bill Clinton liked to soak them "in cider".

mwhittington wrote:Some people like to soak their cigars in rum. Still others like to soak them in whiskey. Bill Clinton liked to soak them "in cider".

http://instantrimshot.com/

Those are great

Thank you, thank you! Hey, I just got promoted to Lt. Commander! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!

mwhittington wrote:Thank you, thank you! Hey, I just got promoted to Lt. Commander! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!

Good deal!


Now, I'd like an onion bagel with cream cheese and lox. Anyone else want anything?

Tsukiyumi wrote:

mwhittington wrote:Thank you, thank you! Hey, I just got promoted to Lt. Commander! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!

Good deal!


Now, I'd like an onion bagel with cream cheese and lox. Anyone else want anything?

(Slices plain bagel, slaps on slab of onion with whipped cream, limburger cheese, and a padlock on top) Here ya go, Tsu! Anything else?