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The Joke Thread
Re: The Joke Thread
How does crow taste? 
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They say that in the Army,
the women are mighty fine.
They look like Phyllis Diller,
and walk like Frankenstein.
the women are mighty fine.
They look like Phyllis Diller,
and walk like Frankenstein.
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Re: The Joke Thread
Eat a nice piece of rye toast covered in schmalz, and you get an honorary membership.Tsukiyumi wrote:I also like Matzo, latkes, blintzes, and I love Reuben sandwiches.Mikey wrote:are you my cousin?Tsukiyumi wrote:Now, I'd like an onion bagel with cream cheese and lox. Anyone else want anything?
PS - "schmalz" = rendered chicken fat, often served as "gribbenes," which is pan-fried schmalz with sauteed onions. It's as tasty as it sounds disgusting.
I can't stand nothing dull
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
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Re: The Joke Thread
I couldn't be Jewish, I love pork too much. Everyone loves bacon, even vegans.
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -Benjamin Franklin-
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Re: The Joke Thread
Oww, quit iiiiittt! Gee Kaaayyy, Staplic is poking me with a stiiiick!Lt. Staplic wrote:check the rank...and you've been here longermwhittington wrote:Thank you, thank you! Hey, I just got promoted to Lt. Commander! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!![]()
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"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -Benjamin Franklin-
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Re: The Joke Thread
SILENCE....I kill you!

cookie if you can tell me where that comes from (minust the phaser)
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cookie if you can tell me where that comes from (minust the phaser)
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
Re: The Joke Thread
Is it from the B-Side of Simon and Garfunkles 'The Sound of Silence'
"You ain't gonna get off down the trail a mile or two, and go missing your wife or something, like our last cook done, are you?"
"My wife is in hell, where I sent her. She could make good biscuits, but her behavior was terrible."
"My wife is in hell, where I sent her. She could make good biscuits, but her behavior was terrible."
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Re: The Joke Thread
It comes from ventriloquist comedian Jeff Dunham and his Dead Suicide Bomber. I love his stuff! Now gimme my cookie!Lt. Staplic wrote:SILENCE....I kill you!
cookie if you can tell me where that comes from (minust the phaser)
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -Benjamin Franklin-
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Re: The Joke Thread
chocolate chip ok...
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
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Re: The Joke Thread
Chocolate chip is classic, but I like oatmeal raisin myself, gotta keep regular, ya know...
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -Benjamin Franklin-
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Re: The Joke Thread

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
Re: The Joke Thread
Oh god, I hope this thread doesn't degenerate into a discussion of the benefits of fiber 

They say that in the Army,
the women are mighty fine.
They look like Phyllis Diller,
and walk like Frankenstein.
the women are mighty fine.
They look like Phyllis Diller,
and walk like Frankenstein.
- Reliant121
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- bob
- Lieutenant jg
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Re: The Joke Thread
three guys walk into a bar
the fourth one ducks
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a couple has 5 kids
they walk into a bar
the bartender says to the couple:
"so let me get this straight, your 30, and your 28; how many drinks do you want"
couple-"8 beers"
bartender-"ah you want to have a sixth birthday"
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this is the funniest joke ever
the fourth one ducks
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a couple has 5 kids
they walk into a bar
the bartender says to the couple:
"so let me get this straight, your 30, and your 28; how many drinks do you want"
couple-"8 beers"
bartender-"ah you want to have a sixth birthday"
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this is the funniest joke ever